…to go to my doom.

You know what I mean, to become a “Research Volunteer”.

To become a Guinea Pig.

“They can’t hurt me”, I keep on telling myself.

But then I remember what types of things they can do to Research Subjects…

And how they can lie to protect us from altering our answers…Yikes!

Calm down, Jillian…Calm. Down.

On a lighter note, it is Monday. Annddd…I’m done with ALL of my homework already this week, the only thing I gotta’ do is a program that is due next Monday. My very first program in Java. (/Tear/)

At first this morning I woke up to my stomach hurting a Loottt…so I took some Tums and I had to go to class! When I got back it was feeling a bit better, so I ate a bowl of cereal and now I’m eating Fruit Snacks. It feels a lot better now!

My mother told me that they probably wouldn’t let me undergo the tests if I wasn’t feeling too good, but now I am…? :-P

I’ll certainly post when I get back, and somehow I don’t think the butterflies in my stomach now have anything to do with the cereal I ate…

I woke up this morning at 8AM, having only 5 hours of sleep, with my brain seething like nothing else.

I wasn’t sure.

So, I figured I needed some goals, and here I am, 12 hours later, waiting for my friend from over in Hamilton-Whitten to come over and watch a movie with me. My GUY friend, yes, Vince. ;-)

I did a bunch of homework today, only to realize I got even more to do tomorrow, including laundry! Sheesh!

Goals for This Weekend:

Do Homework

Do Laundry

Goals for Next Week:

Make an Appointment with the Study Abroad People

Go to Wal-Mart

Finish Homework Before It’s Due

Understand ITK

I think that the appointment thing will be the best thing I can do because I really want to start going there once a week, probably on Thursdays or Fridays and having them help me fill out my application.

I feel like time is closing in on me quick, and that’s when I started to question myself this morning as well.

Did I really want to do this Study Abroad?

Yes.

Then why was I contemplating this subject at 8 o’clock in the morning if it was set in my mind?

Maybe because I’m getting lazy or don’t have enough time to fill out the application. No, wait that can’t be it because I got plenty of time on Tuesdays and Thursdays AND Fridays to chill out and work on it.

I know what it is.

I’m making up excuses, telling myself it’s going to be too hard to end up doing, flying halfway around the world to go to school.

But I want to do it.