Wow, Merry Christmas everyone! And soon, Happy New Year!

I think one of my new years resolutions is going to be to generate more blog traffic and to BLOG MORE!

There is so much to say and so little time - I hope everyone got what they wanted for Christmas (for Marc, Hanukkah) and more!

I won’t bore you with a list of stuff I got, but I need to highlight one thing in particular that I received, and that is, in a word -

NERDTASTIC

You know that you may want to get counseling for the amount of time you spend on a computer when: 1. You receive computer books for Christmas or 2. When you get bored you hack into your graphing calculator and install Pong on it when you are a 17-year-old in High School.

Neither of which I have EVER done, by the way.

And finally, I present to you THE BEST GIFT EVER!

Prepare yourself for the most wonderful, most entertaining, the gift that EVERYONE wanted as SOON as I opened it up. The REAL cream of the crop when it comes to presents —

BEHOLD!

The Microwave!

Well I told my mother that the duct-taped microwave from my old roommate worked JUST FINE, but she insisted that she get me a new one for Christmas. Go figure.

Actually, that’s not really exciting at all. I have to admit I have not microwaved anything yet with my new microwave, but I can assure you that will be one very entertaining blog entry in the brewer when I do.

Anyways, THIS is actually the most entertaining gift I have received this year. It’s one of those V-Rocker thingies, where it has speakers in the chair and you get 2.1 surround sound in the chair while you rock out and play games on the PS2.

Actually, I also received a really cool controller for the Guitar Hero game. Anyone heard of that game? NO?! GET OUT!

That game rocks - and now I have the first guitar hero, the second one, AND the third one for my entertainment needs. Unfortunately, when I tried to play with my new controller, it did NOT work at all. So today, after going out to lunch with my friend Angela and her daughter, Dominique, we decided to take back the controller and get another one at Best Buy.

This is what you get when you cross a 13-year-old (Angela’s daughter) with a Guitar Controller:

“Like OHMIGODILOVETHISCONTROLLER.”

That was all she said and I was SOLD. Actually, it’s a pretty neat controller when you take away the fact that the STRUMMER LIGHTS UP BLUE.

Guitar Hero rocks.

Well, I figured I would blog because I actually came to my blog yesterday and realized that my entry about kicking people in the groin-area will probably win the contest for the “worst holiday cheer entry of all time” -

Today at work was interesting. A guy I work with, Lowrell, smells…well, GOOD. Every time he walks by I try to figure out if he’s wearing cologne by trying to get high off of his scent.

Let’s just say that I’m going to force my next boyfriend to smell like him.

“Do you wear cologne everyday or something?” I blurt out while he’s cutting pizza.

“Yeah, it’s cologne.”

“What’s the name of it?” I ask, only it probably sounded more like: “CAN I HAVE SEX WITH YOU?!”

Lowrell just looks at me weird and tells me. Of course, I forgot the name of it already.

“Why?” Lowrell says, a look of panic suddenly crossing his face, “Does it smell bad or something?!”

Wow, a guy who is ACTUALLY wears cologne to Dominos! I consider it a good day when more than half the staff showers for the day, honestly.

Speaking of Dominos, I actually have off for the next, um, three days. WOO HOO! Today though I had about 300 (that number is rounded up slightly…) people ask me if we are open for Christmas, and when I tell them No they are all like “Why not? Don’t you guys work everyday all day and don’t have LIVES?!”

Actually, I’ll leave you with a phone conversation that happened today that was very entertaining -

“Thank you for calling Dominos Pizza will this be for delivery or pick-up?” I say the normal question.

“Yes, what type of meat do you have?” A male voice asks.

“Pepperoni, sausage, beef, bacon, ham and philly steak,” I reel off rapidly.

“You don’t have any vegetables?!” The man’s voice suddenly sounds panicky and jumps up a few octaves. I would probably get the same reaction if I told him that CHRISTMAS IS CANCELED.

“Yessss but you were asking about MEATS,” I emphasize. I believe 30 lashings with expired dough should teach him well. I tell him all the vegetables, anyways.

“Okay I’ll have a pizza with all of the vegetables on it,” He says, sounding relieved that the vegetables have been spared from a certain death.

Well, that’s about all I have about spreading holiday cheer. Wait, that really wasn’t about spreading holiday nor cheer, was it?

Dammit.