So, how was your week? Mine? Oh, it was fine; up until the point when I had to get my car fixed for 900 dollars and then I had a coronary and was placed in a mental institution - HOW WAS YOUR WEEK AGAIN?!

I really, honestly wish that looking at a car was like fixing a bug in a program. Do you have ANY idea how much money I probably could have saved? Let me start: I noticed about a week ago that the back part of my car was sitting on top of my tires. It was mainly brought to my attention because a guy I know (who knows a LOT more about cars than I do) said “How long have your back springs been broken?”. My first thought was: “Are you making a reference at my ass?”

So, I took my car to Sears - they put it up in the air and told me that for a mere 1300 dollars they could fix it for me. I said “HELL NO”, and then went to Midas who showed me what was wrong. Basically the back springs were so completely obliterated that one of the broken parts had worn a tread in the inner wall of the tire. The mechanic also said that this is a frequent problem with the Ford Taurus’, and he was right. Midas told me that I should get it fixed IMMEDIATELY. So, I did.

Unfortunately, the extent of my knowledge of cars goes something like this: (Open the hood of the car and point to the inner parts) “ENGINE” I can proudly proclaim to anyone nearby.

Now you see I have a problem.

Let’s fast-forward a few days. I’m driving back from my parents house (with my car newly fixed), and I notice something very interesting. There is no light to tell you what you are pressing on the steering wheel.

Let me demonstrate:

I think that brings my point across very nicely. Wait, you can’t see anything?! Let’s try another angle:

Still nothing? Oh, wait, that is because there is NOTHING to see. So imagine this: You are driving, and it is night-time. You merge onto the interstate and step on the gas until you get to your desired speed (for me it was 65 m.p.h. - don’t break the law kiddies ah hah…). You look down (briefly) at your steering wheel to see where the “On” button is for the cruise control. You also try to find the “Set Speed” button. Let’s have a look at what you would see if you were driving my car:

Well, that certainly puts everything in a pickle doesn’t it? So now you can imagine my dilemma as I probably look like a dumbass punching random buttons until I found the right combination to set the cruise control properly. Is it so hard to ask for them to put glow-in-the-dark buttons on the steering wheel? I mean, they have them on the WINDOW buttons fer cryin-out-loud! Exhibit A:

Maybe I should write them a letter.